The Infinite Heavens - a mind expanding journey of Enlightenment, Violence and Blasphemy across the uncharted realms of the afterlife

Piecewise, the Creator

You died. At some point, somewhere. And now you're here. Here is a bit complicated; those nice compact heavens and hells of the meat realm have no bearing here. Some say that every god, hell, heaven, demon, and realm of deathly habitation dreamed of by man, beast, alien, or office furniture has ended up here; an endless plane of questionable morality and painful geography. Others say that this chaos is the corpse of god, rotting down into infinite, mindless creation. But most simply ignore these questions and live an undying life of repeated incarnations as they see fit; living, dying and returning elsewhere as something different.

You're recently incarnated yourself, maybe it's the first time and you've just died in the old meat realm of mortals or maybe its your 10,000th time and you're the spirit of a velociraptor. In any case, you've appeared in an upstairs single suite at the Motel 9 somewhere along the road in the 88,888,888th hell. It's a desert with tiny eyeballs instead of grains of sand, with a burning, eyeless baby vomiting flaming pitch onto the distant horizon instead of a sun. As far as hells go, it's not bad. The pay-per-view in the room is lousy though, nothing but X-rated nature shows.

At some point last night you wandered into the motel lobby and, amongst many many MANY beers, made a pact with 4 other motel patrons. A pact of the grandest significance imaginable. In this world of endless heavens, there must be a first. The First God and the First Heaven, the progenitor of all that has come after. And you, and your very drunk compatriots, have made a solemn vow to find this god and that heaven. Or become gods yourselves. Or find a nice heaven to settle down in. The details are a bit hazy, but it was very important and inspiring, and involved getting out of this hell, you're sure of that. And you're pretty sure you remember peeing on a potted plant, but that's not important.

You woke up this morning, laying on the floor in the lobby. The Manager- an amiable giant praying mantis in a vest and bow-tie - is dead, slumped over the front desk with his head missing. Outside is his jeep, fueled and ready, red leather seats beckoning. Your companions are starting to stir and awaken. There is only one thing to do: make good on those drunken pronouncements of valor and poor planning!



John (Comrade P.)Edit

Status: not accustomed to a new body yet

Appearance: a humanoid figure in voluminous clothes of raw, but sturdy fabric dyed a strange shade of organic green, with a black surcoat and head wrap. Head is permanently tilted at a roguish angle.

Good at: driving

Bad at: settling in one certain place, making a camp, things like that


  • Blood-powered gun (9/9)

John's bag:

    • A small monkey wrench
    • A screwdriver
    • Pocket knife
    • Lighter
    • Tin cartridge box (The Gun rounds, unopened)
    • Tin cartridge box (1 "blanc" round + 2 rounds with Xan's blood)
    • Map of Slenceville and Hellway 888
    • Map of the SuperHell
    • Book on blood rituals
    • 1 gold coin with Henry Ford's profile stamped on one side and a fancy 1 stamped on another. On the side of the coin there is an inscription, it says: "Everything can be done better than it had been done until now"
    • Flask (empty)

Gameplay notes: Oil for blood, combustion engine instead of human insides, food - gas; core can be extracted and placed in a new body; cannot turn his head independently of his shoulders.

Xankarvo (Xantalos)Edit

Status: Feeling powerful; okay physically

Appearance: A tall bald guy in voluminous robes of glaring purple and shining silver and deep black, with a track suit in those same colors underneath it. His clothes are a little burned and smeared with blood in some places. His left arm resembles a crab claw. His teeth are made out of steel and flint.

Good at: He's extremely good at setting things on fire

Bad at: Socializing/resolving things peacefully


  • Olive
  • Toothpick
  • Fancy pen
  • Xankarvo's Robes
  • Xankarvo's Tracksuit
  • Lamellar chestplate
  • Pointy grey hat with fairly wide brim
  • Book titled "Mass suggestion, Thought-forms, populace embued preternatural capacities and the self feeding god cycle"; Contents: [1], [2], [3], [4], [5], [6], [7].
  • Voice Of The People (Fist-sized seashell. Scarred man says "When you need it, write a message with the person's name and their desire and put it into this shell. Then smash the shell. It will take a few minutes to begin, and once it does it will only last a short time.")
  • Few pages of notebook paper

Gameplay notes: food - mundane; flint and steel teeth. Fire magic powers.

Xankarvo's Grudge List:

  • Most High, flaming god heart, for turning arm into fruit - accomplished by John
  • Mr. Bird, for interfering with his telekinesis attempts - forgiven for giving in the lead in book purchase

Hyenakles (DoctorMcTaalik)Edit

Status: good as new, at least physically speaking.

Appearance: A hyena wearing a cloak made of a hide of a beast resembling a lion; the fur is red and the head of the beast is made into helmet. Hyena man talks, has pseudo-hands, and can stand up on its hind legs.

Good at: Hunting, making people buy things.

Bad at: Empathy. As a man, he was absorbed in his own self-pity; as a hyena, he's naturally self-centered and sleazy


  • No Deer shank(!)
  • Single-shot rifle
  • Box of rifle ammo
  • Fur cloak w/ hood

Gameplay notes: food - mundane + raw meat

Dave (Toaster)Edit

Status: -

Appearance: Dave appears like a cartoon drawing of a triceratops that looks like it fell out of a kid's show somewhere.  It's much smaller than a real triceratops, being around the size of a moderately large dog; 80 pounds or so.  He can speak normally and has a limited ability to manipulate things with his mouth.

Good at: Tying ropes, as befitting a sailor... though without hands he's fairly hampered at this.  Excellent sea legs, so can balance on anything moving; now easier with four legs.

Bad at: Resisting a drink... or many of the similar intoxicants available.  Responsible for at least half of his "deaths" besides his first one.


  • (nothing)

Gameplay notes: food - herbivore nutrition type, so plants and leaves

Mr. Bird (Harry Baldman) Edit

Status: -

Appearance: Mr. Bird looks almost exactly like a bearded vulture, to be perfectly honest, except at the end of his wings one can see small, clawed fingers that lead one to suspect he may secretly be some kind of dinosaur, disregarding the obvious fact that birds are, in fact, dinosaurs. For some reason he looks very expensive.

Good at: flying, extracting nutrients from tough bones, high altitude survival (physiologically speaking - if that's not specific enough, let's say resistance to oxygen deprivation in thinner than average air)

Bad at: blending in or looking inconspicuous, unless it's in a zoo


  • (nothing)

Gameplay notes: flying; food - marrow, old meat (tolerable), needs less water

HurHuum-HurRumm (Egan_BW) Edit

Status: Fine, bottle-shaped scar

Appearance: A hovering glass sphere. It pulses with an internal light and contains a human brain. Strapped to it is a skull, which speaks the thoughts of the brain inside with dry, hissing voice, used for verbal communication. The sphere is capable of emitting a sound like humming but cannot speak on its own. It can't see and instead uses echolocation. as well, it can use a weak telekinetic force, just enough to lift itself and some small objects.

Good at: Singing and Listening.

Bad at: Combat and heavy lifting.


  • Notepad and pencil
  • Talking Skull

Gameplay notes: needs to be exposed to loud noises once in two days; can be repaired by rubbing glass shards against damaged areas

The Transport Edit


Status: Engine Spirit removed

Appearance: something like this


Gameplay notes: engine not in perfect condition after John tinkered with it

LC Dauntless ("The Warbeast")

Status: stable and controllable

Appearance: The beast is at least five stories tall, and the immediate impression it gives is that of an armored gorilla. It has the same heavy, oversized upper body and hunched, knuckle walking stance. But the face and head have a more mandrill like appearance, a longer muzzle with a very obvious and oversized fangs. It has a line of seven orange eyes spaced evenly across its face, and a reptile like slit nose, but otherwise the face is smooth and featureless except for the bone structure underneath. The body is covered in thick black hair, except for the hands which are scaly and end in talons. Its armor is a mess; clearly at one point is was more then likely either fully armored or close to it, but much of it has fallen away. There are scattered lamellar metal plates, bindings of faded red fabric, snapped rope and cables on tightly clinging metal rings. The metal plates were once very ornate, you can see the fading, worn away paint and the engravings they still bear, but they've clearly been exposed to the elements for quite a while. On it's shoulders and head is an entire platform system, metal and wood structure that appear to have their foundations sunk straight into the creature's flesh. There are structures up there, perched on those platforms, and even what look like banners, still flying on their poles.

Engine Spirit, a little sentient trinket able to extend its control to inanimate vehicles and mechanisms, is currently serving as voice control for the Warbeast.

Xankarvo named Engine Spirit after himself, it hasn't stuck to it quite yet, but has all chances to do so.


Inside the building:

  • Unidentified equipment on corpses on the open platforms, most likely rendered useless by weather over time the beast wandered around
  • Half a barrel of gas
  • Large supply of food, water and alcohol (listed separately below)
    • two large ceramic jugs, both glazed with a rough brown substance (Redneck Santa)
    • several small glass bottles (Redneck Santa)
    • barrel of some beverage (Lupine People)
  • 6 gladius swords
  • 2 single-shot rifles
  • 3 bows
  • Large box of arrows
  • Several boxes of ammo (30 rounds each)
  • 6 full sets of clothes and armor + several more scattered pieces
  • 6 metal shafted spears
  • Several beds and other pieces of furniture
  • Some wood, as well as some cloth for banners
  • 0 nails :(
  • Large jar with translucent plant (current effects listed)
    • mild narcotic
    • healing powers of some degree
    • will NOT grow sacks of consumable liquids
  • 3 makeshift Molotov cocktails
  • 10 "explosive rocks", for the lack of better term
  • No deer shank(!)

Gameplay notes: Tarmac brought engine spirit over; I'm just gonna leave a bunch of links to various bits of info that aren't exactly about appearance here.

People we just metEdit

These are people who were introduced in game, but aren't yet accepted into party. To get accepted in the party, you... have to... make the party like you. Somehow. Probably prove to them that you're useful. Or bribe them. Or point a gun at them. Or whatever makes them say "okay, you can travel with us". Be creative!


These people are waiting for their turn to be introduced into the game. Apparently, if player from Party goes unresponsive, people from Waitlist can assume control of his character and make him/her/it do whatever. They mostly try to forcibly make him create a vacancy in Party by doing outright dangerous and potentially lethal things. Think of it as of a special kind of madness that fills the air of Infinite Heavens, the one that waits patiently until any mind gets carried away, and assumes control of the body.

Dead and/or LostEdit

Shawn McCrary - FIRST BLOOD! Or... well, technically... nevermind. Lost in search of himself in a bonepile at Wall of Teeth (a.k.a. Tourist Trap), then abducted by Bone thieves, poor skeleton

Last words: "...well hi there! I was wondering if maybe you fine beings would be able to help me. As you can see I am a skull, but I used to be an entire skeleton. If you fine beings could help me with that, I most certainly would be willing to help you in your endeavours. So what say you?"

Let Mr. Skeltal grant you entrance to his spooky kingdom.

Ken the Colored Gorilla - KIA during Bone Thieves attack on Slenceville.

He had few words to say and even fewer fucks to give

Golgon the Destroyer - Died protecting his new friends during the same attack. Curse the Bone Thieves!

A devoted friend and bold leader. Used as a decoy.

Haast - fruitified by the lightning bolt by the Most High of the Salthe. Yeah, that happened.

Last words: *indistinct distorted roaring*

The mascot we deserved.

Flamengo John - another person turned into fruits. Spicy fruits. And a habanero like hat.

Last words: "Groovy"

He left this hell of a party to go join another one

Tarmac - died mysteriously while facing off against Most High

Last words: *after enduring the third strike of fruitifying lightning, which affected his belogings* "YOU BASTARD! MY MUNCHIES WERE IN THERE! NOW I'M GONNA MUNCH ON YOU!"

You'll blaze eternal, wasted and high in your own Junk-halla.

Rocky - sold to a travelling merchant after he rolled around yelling something about "mateys" and "poop deck" way too much.

Had no idea who was really running a tight ship here.

Anna Windstrom - Unceremoniously immolated by Xankarvo as part of his patented "Magical Sacrifice Fat Lady to Heal Hyena" ritual. And subsequently eaten by the party.

Last words: *unintelligible screaming*

She died by our sins.

Dianne Jones-Lee - Tried to hitch a ride on a passing pyromancer, in a last ditch effort to avoid splattery death on the plummeting Warbeast. Gravity won.

Last words: "JESUS HELP US ALL."




Tarmac's last stand against the Most High of Salthe, by Comrade P.


Christmas trade, by Comrade P.


Party, as seen mid-august 2015, by Comrade P.


John, Hyenakles and Xankarvo after escaping Most High's presence, by Comrade P.


Party, as seen autumn 2015, by DoctorMcTaalik


Redneck Santa, Christmas 2015, by DoctorMcTaalik

Hyenakles in cloak, by DoctorMcTaalik

Hyenakles in cloak, by DoctorMcTaalik